The Future of Ordering Floating Shelves is Here (sort of )
Introducing--KTLR 1.0 Advanced Customer Update System
Attention, everyone! KTLR 1.0 is the epitome of Shelf Intelligence. He--I mean It--is the zenith of evolutionary perfection--man and machine perfectly blended into a warm robot human soup. A fleshy intelligence that sees and knows all about your floating shelf, floating mantel, floating desk--floating anything--orders and even tells you about it. Yes, friends, no longer will you place an order and wait patiently but ignorant of whether we are building your floating shelves or playing D&D. Now with KTLR 1.0 you will know exactly where your order is in the manufacturing process and have up-to-the-day updates emailed right to your very own inbox!
“Wow. I am so excited” says CEO+Chief Shelf Nerd of Shelfology, Kevin Anderson. “We can, like, tell people where their orders are at any given time, with a simple combination of advanced biomatronics, super glue and a Jcrew look alike mannequin”